2009-06-09

stream of consciousness

Finally one day I force myself to get almost 8 solid hours of sleep. Too many things to do, big and small; to many cracks for them to slip through. Enough times of wanting to stop and... think... and... feel. In the morning I find Mail.app crashing. WTF? I remember about haxies, inputmanagers, the works. Should be clean, but recently found and deleted an unwelcome Smart Crash Reporter. Check. There it is again. Trash it. Google for it; how to avoid them in the future? Nothing definite (will try folder actions for alerts + file named "smart crash reporter" so it can't be created; if that trick worked for a trojan, should work for something less evil). But meanwhile I found that in the list of programs using Smart Crash Reporter is Quicksilver, which I am perennialy running. (too easy / out-of-the-blue to be reliable, but Mail is not crashing any more...) Quicksilver. So much time w/o updating, and it never seems to do automatically. (still didn't finish watching their techtalk @ google). Look for it. No updates anyway. Stumble upon Quicksilver's charismatic "about box". Act without doing. Maybe read again Tao Te Ching. Prepare jedzenia for the day. Add egg to the curry recipe which was missing it, try to shortcut by using microwave oven, try to avoid getting food poisoned by raw egg. Try new coffe machine. Microwave tupperware to see how it stands boiling water. A lingering idea which finally surfaces in a disconcertingly, almost uncomfortably clear form: "what would you outsource in your life?" A very good formulation to start thinking on. Google it, double quotes and all. See who else got into that. "The four hour workweek". Funny, stumbled upon that months ago, even thought on buying it. A cursory read of the index and opinions proved enough at the moment. And didn't want to finance the guy's four hour workweek, anyway :P. (will that mention bait him?) But certainly was food for thought. Or better, a bit of flesh for the skeleton I had already began to shape. Intuition that this leads to the big questions. What does it mean to be alive? What is life? What would I like to outsource? What would I like to be outsourced to? Is it really about money, work? (no, of course not. That was easy. Glad.) I am a problem solver. But I don't want to be Sisyphus. (there goes another undercurrent idea of lately. Interesting.) I want to be a enabler. I want to lend my shoulders so others can stand on them. (funny... do I want to be a giant? ...no, not really... but I should, if I want my shoulders to be useful...) Don't I prefer to be the one who sees further instead? ... Well, yes, but... in fact I don't see the options are disjunct... "why aren't you advancing the limits of your field?" - who was that? A nobel... will have to look for that again. http://www.paulgraham.com/hamming.html Quickly going thru it again. Another bingo: "Luck favors the prepared mind". Pasteur, Seagal (chuckle). And Aikido. Again I will have to forsake it today. Well, if I can finish the taxes thingie, it will be acceptable. But Chiba sensei's course is damn close. And Aikido itself is another thing to be examined. Wondering if I have outgrown it already. Does that even make sense? Enough food for thought. Time to ruminate. And to go to work. Sinchronicity: little after writing this, I learn that Google is publishing GoogleSearchBox... which looks like QS... whose creator had been hired by Google time ago. I guess that's the reason he had a techtalk? So glad for him... ... and envious. Ruminate, ruminate. "I have made this one longer only because I have not had the leisure of making it shorter."

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